Someone Was Missing!

I grew up in a typical American family in the 1970's---dad, mom, my brother, and me. My dad worked hard to provide and my mom stayed home to care for us. Even with a five year age difference, people asked if my brother and I were twins, we were so close. We did everything together. We were American Indians building tipis, cowpokes wearing our matching fringed vests and holsters, and pioneers living off the land in the woods behind our house. We took turns playing Barbies and Matchbox cars.

We had tons of fun times, yet something was missing. My brother and I both felt that there should have been another sibling between the two of us (a sister, in my mind). We spoke of it to each other, but never to our parents. We both wanted more playmates and all our adventures included large families. If one sister and one brother could have fun together, surely more would have a blast!
Mom would sometimes bring up wanting to be pregnant again or adopting a boy for my brother and a girl for me, but nothing ever happened. I never knew about birth control and sterilization. I just figured that she couldn't have any more babies and that we were not able to adopt.

As an older child, I would pretend to be pregnant, giving birth, and nursing babies even though I had never been around any of that in my home. My mom didn't breastfeed and I don't have many memories of life before my brother. I remember a picture that I drew as a young teen of my future family. I was in the center, surrounded by my children of four girls and four boys.

This desire never left me. Later in high school, I was talking with one of my best friends and told her that I wanted to have at least six to eight children someday. In my junior year, that same best friend introduced me to his college-aged brother. He became my first boyfriend a month later.

The week of my graduation, I found out I was pregnant. My parents were upset. To tell you the truth, upset is putting it mildly. They had never yelled at me before that time. There were many tears, pleadings, door slammings, and outbursts after my graduation ceremony. I spent at least one night sleeping in my car at the end of my driveway trying to avoid another heated conversation.
My parents wanted me to go to college, not get married to my first boyfriend, and throw my life away. The only way to fix this was to have an abortion! They told me that later on I would be a more capable mother as a college graduate. I would be doing my boyfriend, myself, and this baby a disservice if I kept it and became a wife and mother now.

"I just can't," I replied.

My mom assured me that it would be alright. After all, it wasn't as if I was really in love with my boyfriend. We weren't really committed. She told me she had an abortion when she was married, for goodness sake. Between me and my brother.

I was shocked, horrified, and devastated. My brother and I knew all along someone was missing! But, how incredibly horrible! My little sister had been killed. Taken away from us by our own parents, her own parents. I mourned my loss and have not stopped doing so for these last 25 years. My sister, my children's aunt, my children's cousins, my nieces and nephews and their children--all taken from our family. I hope to see my sister in heaven, but we will never have the opportunity to meet her family because they were never allowed to be.

Abortion is a devastating action. It destroys a precious baby from God. It destroys moms and dads emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually (maybe the abortion caused some of my mom's depression). It destroys the family that God desires to design and give. It destroys trust and innocence. It destroys life-long sibling bonds and more. It destroys what should be.

Thank God for His grace that He bestows upon all who come to Him through His Son, Jesus Christ. This is the only hope for those of us who suffer the consequences of abortion. Whether you are a doctor or nurse who has aborted babies, grandparents who convinced their daughter to abort their grandchild, a father who convinced his child's mother to abort their baby, or a mother who aborted her child. If you have had someone taken from you through abortion, Christ Jesus can forgive, cleanse, comfort, heal, restore, and renew you. Come to Jesus today, right now!

A GRIEVING DAUGHTER

P.S. WHAT HAPPENED TO ME? My first boyfriend and I celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary this year, along with our six children! Thank you, Lord.