2. Beware of being a control freak.

While I believe God has made the husband to be the head of his family, including his wife, he would be wise to refrain from over-lording and heavy-demanding ways. A husband's headship is best displayed in loving leadership, 1 Corinthians 13:5 says, "Love seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil."

A dominating and over-powering husband who micro-manages his wife so she cannot make any decisions on her own, or even go anywhere without his approval, will drive his wife not only out of the home, but also out of the marriage.

The best husbands are the easy going ones who are not overly anxious about everything. It is their pleasure to see their wife free, contented, and happy.

Overbearing husbands who stifle every initiative their wife brings up will find it difficult to keep them at home, let alone contented at home.

Be encouraged. Colin
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1. Do not oppose her personal desires on how she wants to make her home a place where she will feel contented.

Rather than opposing your wife, you should encourage her opinions on how she wants the decor, the pictures on the wall, or the arrangement of the furniture. Remember, she lives in the house much more than you do. You should pitch in and help her with what she suggests to make it happen. Many women could possibly be tempted to go back to the corporate world if they feel they are deprived of having their nest the way that makes them feel comfortable.

Remember, just as you want an occupation you can be contented with, so your wife should have her home the way she feels it should be.

I am not talking about yielding to her demands to live in a mansion or spend beyond the budget. At least, let her make the most of what she's got, whether the home be below average, average, or above average.

I know there is a balance to all this and the wife should also consider her husband's opinions.

Be encouraged to seek your wife's happiness and contentment.

Colin
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Because so many women are encouraged to leave their home, I thought I would write some practical points to not only encourage women back into the home, but to help them to feel glad and contented to be at home.

What is a home without a mother in it? It is nothing but an empty shell. It is sterile. It has no atmosphere. When mother is not in the home the children, of necessity, will be elsewhere, but not with their mother.

The home needs a mother and true mothers need homes. Homes and mothers are synonymous terms.

Some women have taken the plunge to come home, but have found it difficult because of negative pressures. A husband who does not have strong convictions on this subject is one of the main culprits. Even if he does have strong convictions, but does not know how to encourage his wife to be happy at home, he can easily loose his wife back to the corporate world.

Tomorrow, I will begin a list of practical suggestions for men on how to bring this encouragement to their wives.

Be encouraged. Colin
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All sin, including adultery, theft, homosexuality and murder, etc., must be repented of (1 Corinthians 6:9-11). To know all Scripture without the power and love of the Holy Spirit leads to death. To have all Spirit without a good knowledge of the Scripture can lead to error and also to death.

Men, there is a balance in all Scripture. All Christians should seek the Lord to keep them in the place of balance. I recently watched a DVD which showed the different approaches to winning the lost. One was to stand up in the middle of “red light” areas of our inner cities and hold up signs with Scriptures condemning sin and calling people to repent (somewhat pharisaical). The others reached out with arms of love without any reference to repentance.

I favor the second approach above the first. However, the true gospel or “good news” is what Peter stated to the crowd that gathered at Pentecost whose hearts had been pricked by Peter’s preaching. “Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized everyone of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost” (Acts 2:38).

Paul’s preaching to the Athenians was “And the times of this ignorance God winked at; but now commandeth all men everywhere to repent: because He hath appointed a day, in the which He will judge the world in righteousness by that man whom He hath ordained” (Acts 17:30-31).

I believe there is a difference between love and acceptance.

The truth is that God loves sinners.

The truth is also that God accepts sinners into His family based on repentance. Believing in Jesus implies repentance (John 3: 6-21).

May God help us to walk in discernment (Malachi 3:18).

Be encouraged. Colin

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