In the first three chapters of Genesis, we read six different names for woman—female, woman/wife (same Hebrew word), mother, Eve, and help meet (two words). Each one reveals a different aspect of who we are. Wow, we are so versatile and amazing!
The words help meet in the Hebrew are “ezer kenegdo.” And what a glorious meaning? The word “ezer” is the Hebrew word for helper. Many women think this is a subservient role. Oh no, it is powerful and amazing. Think about it. When you need help, you need someone who can do what you cannot do, someone who has more expertise than you in a certain field. In the ministry of Above Rubies we daily work on the computers and often things go wrong. I must confess I am not a computer expert and when something goes wrong, I need help. I need my computer tech. I’m helpless without him. Is his service to me demeaning? No, I am desperate for his help, and grateful.
In the same way, God created us to help our husbands in their areas of need. We desperately need one another. We are not whole without one another. My husband has strengths that I don’t have. I have strengths that he doesn’t have and so we fit together like a glove.
If I try to fulfil his role, I am wasting my time and depriving him of his anointing. He wasn’t created to fulfill my role. God has given to me as a woman the management of the home. That’s not my husband’s job. God has given him the mandate to provide for and lead the home.
“Ezer” is used 21 times in the Bible and yet 16 of those times are used to describe God as Deliverer, Protector, Rescuer, Savior, Strengthener, Protector, and Helper. And yet the amazing thing is the very first time this word is used, it is used to describe the glorious woman God created. Dear wife, and mother, as a helper, you are showing to your husband and to the world what God is like.
The word comes from two Hebrew root words:
1) To rescue, to save
2) To be strong
Today my husband is 82 years. This morning we were basking in the joy of our lives together for nearly 60 years. He was thanking me for serving him and I was thanking him for serving me. We both serve one another in our different God-given ways, and it makes life one beautiful story.
The word kenegdo means “counterpart (the part which fits another), corresponding to, part opposite.” Let’s look at some other translations to help us understand more fully:
“I will make him a helper that is PERFECT FOR HIM" (CEB).
“I will make him a helper FIT FOR HIM" (ESV and RSV).
“I will make him a SUITABLE HELPER, COMPLETING HIM” (TBV- The Berkely Version).
“I will make a helper who is JUST RIGHT FOR HIM.” (NLT, GW, and NCV). I love these words, don’t you? When God created the women, He created her “just right for the man.” She is the perfect fit.
God created man with specific strengths, but He also gave specific strengths to the woman to bring into the marriage. We don’t bring the man’s strengths, but the beautiful strengths God has given to us. Adam didn’t need another man; he needed a woman who would fit and complete him. Two pieces of a puzzle that are the same shape cannot fit together. You can only put one on top of the other which eclipses the other.
God created you to be a strong God-given helper to your husband, saving him in so many areas, but that does not make you the spiritual head of your home. It does not make you the breadwinner. That doesn’t save your husband; it destroys and pulls down your husband’s strengths.
I love this picture of God coming to the help of Israel. This is the way we can come to the help of our husbands, not like little doormats but riding in the anointing and majestic glory God has given us as we pour out our lives to build our marriages and homes.
Deuteronomy 33:26: “There is none like unto the God of Jeshurun, who rideth upon the heaven in thy help, and in his excellency on the sky.”
Be encouraged and inspired,
Nancy Campbell