Above Rubies Daily Encouragement Blogs

Men, how can we say we role model the love of God when we think or meditate on anything evil? Evil thoughts of resentment, retribution, or how we may pay back someone who has hurt us, now or in the past, grieves the Holy Spirit within us. In turn, this eclipses and hinders the love of God from flowing through us.

Matthew 5:45 says, "That we may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust."

Romans 12:17-19 says, "Recompense to no man evil for evil... Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves... for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the lord."

This is why, as Christians, we should not take one another to court. We should not think or plan on how we may destroy or damage anyone who may have harmed us.

Jesus Christ, in His famous Sermon on the Mount speaks much on this subject. Matthew 5:44-45 says, "Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love they neighbor, and hate thine enemy. But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute your: that ye may be the children of your Father which is heaven."

Men, our sons and daughters need to see us role modeling this kind of love. This is real love.

Be encouraged.

Colin Campbell

Men who are easily angered cannot role model the love. Anger that is not under strict self-control has great destructive potential. There is such a thing called righteous indignation which Jesus Christ Himself manifested when He cleansed the temple and yet He did not sin. Ephesians 4:26 says, "Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: neither give place to the devil."

Anger is not a sin in itself. It is a sin when it gets out of control. There are many times God's sinless anger is manifested in Scripture.

Children should be role-modeled by fathers that are not easily provoked to anger. Children should not have to tip toe around their father lest the slightest infraction should start an avalanche of anger.

Anger has great potential for both wife abuse and child abuse. This abuse can be both verbal and physical. The truth is that both forms of anger are destructive and not acceptable. Both forms are ungodly and sinful. If a man cannot disciple his anger, no woman or child should be forced to suffer it. The father should seek serious counsel and, if this problem continues, no one should be bound to live with it.

I loathe separation, but I loathe abusive anger more. If you can't control your anger, you should live with it on your own. Why should others suffer?

Be encouraged.

Colin Campbell

In the end, after sharing strong convictions from our hearts, we have to have to walk in God's love that allows others their own freedom of choice to do what they think is right for them. We all know that even God does not force people to accept the salvation He offers them in Christ Jesus. He allows them to make their own decision to believe or disbelieve. Their rejection does not stop God loving them.

I have wondered why God did not slay Cain for killing his brother Abel, even though he was forced to be a fugitive and go outside the covering of God's presence that was over Adam and Eve. Yet, God put a mark of protection on Cain that would hinder others from slaying him. God showed Cain mercy in His judgment even though Cain said, "My punishment is greater than I can bear" (Genesis 4:13).

God continues to show mercy to sinners whereas we can so quickly write them off. Jesus still loved the rich young ruler who walked away from Him (Mark 10:21). As husbands, we must be careful about bullying our wives to agree with every opinion we hold. As our children grow up there will come times when we have to allow them to pursue their own careers and leadings from God. Even where there is a difference of opinion, we must still be careful about demanding our own way.

Be encouraged.

Colin Campbell

"A woman needs a man she can trust and a man who will be true to his word. His word should be his bond. A man of integrity is a man who can be respected and honored. The lustful eyes of the porn-peeping womanizer do not belong to the man of integrity."

~ Colin Campbell

This is hard for us to take as we face this problem daily from political enemies who live in the same country, dine at the same restaurants, and shop and the same shops. Some even attend the same church. And yet they vote for leaders that we would not vote for, "not even with a forty foot pole" as the saying goes. This is the problem with American's brand of nationalized health care which the majority of voters do not want, but are being forced to go along with it, or pay an ever increasing fine.

What makes things worse is when members of our own family do not agree with the viewpoints we hold so dear. When we share our deepest convictions on what we regard as very important to us and to God, and family friends or foes hold an opposite opinion, we have to allow them to have their opinions, so long as they do not force us to go along with them. We cannot demand our own way.

My wife and I believe, from the untwisted Word of God, that Christian families should embrace all the children God wants them to have, regardless of what society and even the church is doing. However, the love of Christ within us does not force them. We share with "GRACE and TRUTH" (John 1:14).

Be encouraged.

Colin Campbell

There are those who do many good deeds for the nation, church, friends, and family. Although they may appear to not want attention brought to themselves, secretly they are disappointed when they don't receive appreciation. This Scripture plainly tells us that the godly love we are to model does not "seek her own." This means we are to live a lifestyle of love that does not want to draw attention to ourselves in any way. Our only desire should be that praise and attention should be given to Christ Jesus. In this way, we die to ourselves.

I do not believe it is wrong to acknowledge deeds of kindness and show gratefulness to those who bless us, but the person receiving praise should be quick within their hearts to pass it on to the Lord. If it was not for His grace working in our lives we would not be able to do anything worthy of praise.

Love that is given for the exaltation of self is not the pure love of God. Self love should not be the motive for any service or giving.

Be encouraged.

Colin Campbell

This aspect of God's love must be constantly role modeled in our home first, and then to others. It would be hypocritical to be known by our friends and acquaintances to be polite and gracious and yet be coarse and roughshod with our wife and family at home.

Christian men should act godly toward the opposite sex at all times. To be overly familiar with women, even in a general sense, can be rude, inappropriate, suggestive, and unseemly. We should not love in any way that appears questionable or that would stir up base instincts in the opposite sex. Unseemly behavior is often manifested in the form of coarse joking which contains elements of suggestive sexual innuendos. This type of conversation is not becoming to the love of God.

Talking other people down is also very demeaning and offensive. When others are speaking, we should not interrupt them, especially in public. It is unseemly to act impolitely without using common courtesy. Anger, shouting, and physical or verbal abuse to get our own way is uncalled for behavior. Even facial expressions, pounding of fists on tables, or cold icy moods are unseemly. Meanness to others is also unseemly to the love that God wants us all to role model.

Be encouraged.

Colin Campbell

The main reason why any generation degenerates in its conduct or behavior is the failure of godly role modeling in the home. It can never be underestimated the privilege families have when their parents have truly caught the vision of the power and righteous influence of godly role modeling.

Despite the industrial, scientific, and technological advancements of our western nations, the flip side of the coin reveals that this has done nothing to halt the downward degeneration into vulgarity and rude, unseemly behavior. I think the advancement of some types of electronic communication and media have advanced the destruction of good wholesome generational values at an alarming rate. Our state education refuses to see the importance of moral education being of any value to the preservation of our 21st century civilization.

History abundantly reveals that when morals degenerate so the civilization degenerates and eventually destroys itself.

The home is the foundation of the nation and the state (government) is only as godly as its homes and families. Godly parents are called to be godly role models of the love that is pure, innocent, and wholesome. To resist this kind of role modeling results in national vulgarity and ultimate civil destruction.

Be encouraged.

Colin Campbell

Lord, give me sons like Daniel of old
Who for the truth will be strong and bold,
Sons who would dare to the Lord be true,
Striving to please Him in all that they do.

Lord, give me sons who would dare to do right
When father and mother are nowhere in sight,
Though down in Egypt they stand alone
In the midst of a crowd to evil prone.

Lord, give me sons who are pure in heart;
Who ignore the “sights” in the busy mart
Of girls, too careless to clothe their frame
Yet some even profess to love Jesus’ name!

Lord, give me sons so yielded to Thee
That the world at a glance Thy likeness can see;
O give me sons with ambition so pure
That naught from the path of right can allure.

Lord, of the sons Thou hast lent to me–
I gladly return them for service to Thee,
Nor would I ever in sadness repine,
If Thou should’st reclaim in death what is Thine.

Vera Miller
Reprinted with permission from Heart Throbs of Motherhood.

Last night my little boy
Confessed to me
Some childish wrong;
And kneeling at my knee
He prayed with tears:
"Dear God, make me a man
Like Daddy--wise and strong;
I know you can."

Then while he slept
I knelt beside his bed,
Confessed my sins,
And prayed with low-bowed head,
"O God, make me a child,
Like my child here--
Pure, guileless,
Trusting Thee with faith sincere."

~ Unknown.

Men, the role modeling of God's love, and all the ingredients that make up this love, should be of utmost important to us. This agape love of God is the central emphasis of all of Christ's teaching.

Jesus said in John 13:35, "By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another."

We men must understand that if we ignore any one of the necessary ingredients that make up this love, then the geniuses of our love is in question.

If a person takes a medication that proves to be effective, but the manufacturers suddenly leave out a certain ingredient, or for the sake of cost, use a substitute ingredient that proves to make the overall effect of the medication inferior, that person will cease to use the medication.

If we say we live in the love of God, but at the same time are rude or vulgar with our speech and actions, we seriously compromise the love of God.

In the Greek, the word "unseemly" implies "indecency, unbecoming, shameful, shapeless." A shapeless garment, such as an undergarment, is inappropriate to be seen in public. When our behavior in speech or conduct is inappropriate or rude we are not role modeling the love of God which is so desperately needed in our family life.

Be encouraged.

Colin Campbell

Our home life has its ups and downs,
Some days are dark, some fair:
When comes the night.
But all is right
When Dad calls, “Time for prayer.”

We read the Book for guidance,
Sing praises for His care,
Then as we kneel,
God’s touch we feel,
As Dad leads us in prayer.

Sometimes we face temptations strong,
Or burdens hard to bear,
But hearts grow light,
New hope beams bright,
While Dad’s voice lifts in prayer.

Oh I am rich, his legacy
Exceeds the millionaire’s:
To know you have
The kind of Dad,
Whose daily guide is prayer.

Ada Wine
Reprinted with permission from Heart Throbs of Motherhood

This "puffed up" love is really a description of the false love that "vaunteth itself" (1 Corinthians 13:4). It loves the prominent seats in the church gathering; it loves the religious robes; it loves the display of wealth and fashionable clothes. This phony love enjoys religious debate. It is proud of religious knowledge and the prestige of letters of learning. It loves smug intellectual pride and its false actions of humility. It loves to treat with contempt those who dare to expose its facade of false humility. It also loves to be respected, honored, and praised. Such flattering soothes its lust for conceited self respect. How ugly is all this nonsense and prideful stupidity to God who weighs the hearts of men.

Paul speaks several times about this subject of being puffed up. 1 Corinthians 4:6 encourages us, "not to think of men above that which is written, that no one of you be puffed up for one against another."

1 Corinthians 4:18-20 says, "Now some are puffed up" but Paul answers, "I will know, not the speech of them which are puffed up, but the power. For the kingdom of God is not in word, but in power."

1 Corinthians 5:2 says, "Ye are puffed up, and have not rather mourned, that he that hath done this deed might be taken away from among you."

Colossians 2:18 talks about one who is "vainly puffed up by his fleshly mind."

Jesus warned in Luke 12:1, "Beware of the leaven of the Pharisees, which is hypocrisy." Read also Matthew 16:6 and Mark 8:15.

Leaven (or yeast) is an agent for puffing up and represents pride. During Passover, leaven was not to be found in any homes (Exodus 12:15, 19). It should not be found in our homes either. We fathers have a responsibility to make sure it is put out of our homes.

Be encouraged.

Colin Campbell

Love that "vaunteth not itself" is a love that is not focused on itself. It does not say, "Look at me," "Do you notice what I am doing?" or "Do you appreciate what I have done for you?" True love does not seek attention or acknowledgement from others. Not only does it not seek it, but it takes no credit because it recognizes this love comes from Christ's life within.

On the surface, it will humbly acknowledge praise and appreciation, but deep within it will quickly pass it on to God from whom all blessings flow as Romans 11:36 tells us, "For of him, and through him, and to him, are all things: to whom be glory for ever. Amen."

Men, this love must be role modeled by us, as well as our wives, in order that our children will also learn to walk in this love. We should seek ways and opportunities to demonstrate this love to others as often as possible. This love manifests itself with meekness. The Scriptures speak highly of meekness.

Psalm 22:26 says, "The meek shall eat and be satisfied."
Psalm 25:9 says, "The meek will he guide in judgment, and the meek will he teach his way."
Isaiah 29:19 says, "The meek also shall increase their joy in the Lord."

I think of the meekness of the Son of God, our Lord Jesus Christ. Matthew 21:5 says, "Tell ye the daughter of Zion, Behold, thy king cometh unto thee, meek, and sitting upon an ass, and a colt the foal of an ass."

Organized Christianity knows little of the meaning of "donkey riding," but the King of kings certainly does.

Be encouraged.

Colin Campbell

We are living in a world that is increasingly boastful of itself and even good deeds. Men that blow out their chests and brag about themselves and their accomplishments in order to receive praise and fame are not good role models for their families. I am not saying that we cannot share with our family the victories, blessings, and achievements in our lives. However, we should share in a humble way in order to give God the glory who enables us to fulfill the gifts, talents, and intelligence He has given us. It is God that made us and gives us the very air we breathe.

When we talk about ourselves or are asked to give an account of ourselves to others, be it in the military, the court, the media, the church, or family, we need to role model a love that is not boastful or bragging of self.

God loves meekness. Moses was indeed a great leader, a man who brought about many mighty deeds, and yet the Scripture says in Numbers 12:3, "Now the man Moses was very meek, above all the men which were upon the face of the earth."

Be encouraged.

Colin Campbell

What gifts of speech a man may own,
What grace of manners may appear,
Have little worth unless his heart
Be honest, forthright and sincere.

The sincere man is like a rock,
As true as time; with honest eye
He looks you squarely in the face
Nor turns aside to make reply.

Nothing is hidden; there is no sham,
No camouflage to caution care,
No ifs or buts to haunt the mind,
Or secret doubts to linger there.

A crystal candor marks his speech,
With conscience clear he goes his way,
He does the thing he thinks is right
Nor cares a whit what others say.

Give me a man that is sincere,
And though a wealth of faults attend,
I shall clasp his hand in mind
And claim him as a trusted friend!

~ Alfred Grant Walton

I am preparing an article about the practical things a father should teach his sons. Today, many young men are growing up not knowing how to do basic things that a man needs to know. I would love to hear from you.

Could you please email me with your suggestions to This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..

Put COLIN in the Subject heading.

Thanks,

COLIN

Envy was the sin that caused the chief priests to deliver Jesus to be crucified. Matthew 27:18 says, "For he knew that for envy they had delivered him." The question is, what did they envy about Jesus? Perhaps it was the mighty miracles he performed. Nicodemus stated in John 3: 2, "We know that thou art a teacher come from God: for no man can do these miracles that thou doest, except God be with him."

Perhaps it was the authority by which He spoke. Mark 1:22 says, "And they were astonished at his doctrine: for he taught them as one that had authority, and not as the scribes." Perhaps it was because the multitudes and crowds followed Him, and not them, the spiritual leaders, that made them envious.

The word "jealousy" is used sometimes when translating this same word, e.g. "Jealousy is cruel as the grave" (Song of Solomon 8:6). This point was proved in the sinful reason behind Christ being given over to Pilate for crucifixion.

Proverbs 14:30 says, "A sound heart is the life of the flesh, but envy the rottenness of the bones." In other words, an envious husband is a rotten husband, and the same goes for the wife. We cannot say we have love if at the same time we envy our wife's popularity or intelligence, or perhaps a neighbor's wealth or accomplishments.

How sad it is when a family is destroyed because a spouse envies someone else's spouse. True love rejoices when others are blessed. True love resists all envy and jealousy of others.

Be encouraged.

Colin Campbell

The love chapter tells us that love is not jealous of others (1 Corinthians 13:4). Love is contented with its status or lot in life. Love is not driven by a lust to be noticed, famous, or applauded by this world.

Many homes and families know very little about rest and contentment. The desire to be like the wealthy, to drive an expensive car, to live in an upscale neighborhood, or to have enough money to buy the latest iPhone, computer, or fashionable clothes causes much stress. Mothers feel they have to leave their highest calling of motherhood and put their children in day care centers and state education.

I am not saying that we should not better ourselves if it is within our budget and ability to do so, but we should do this without putting anxiety and stress upon ourselves or our family. I'm not talking about being contented to just sit around and do nothing. Banish the thought. What I am saying is that a discontented and anxious father or mother is not a good role model of the love that does not envy. True love will be calm, relaxed, and enjoy the goodness of the Lord for the blessings and provisions that you have, even though it may be humble.

Men, our wife and family need a relaxed and contented father far more than a nervous, over-driven, and no-time-for-fun father.

Be encouraged.

Colin Campbell